July 12, 2012
Article by Heidi Stevens ( Abbreviated)
” I have hair down there and I really want to shave down there. Is it a good idea?”
So go the comments that caught the attention of the editor (Debra Moffitt) at KidsHealth.org and founder of the Pink Locker society. Moffit says that this question has been coming up more and more and she started seeing it on her blogs. At first she was seeing talk about shaving their legs and eventually started seeing questions asking if Nair could be used down there. She needed to reply “no”!
Girls as young as 11 and 12 are absorbing cultural expectations about their bodies and the prevailing expectations in some circles is that they be hair-free. You can blame air brushed magazines or Kim Kardashian who admits to starting bikini waxes at age 12.
“There might be a place for being upset at the culture,” Moffitt said, “But getting upset with our girls is not helpful”.
You may ask yourself some questions about your daughter such as if she is unhappy about her body or is she sexually active or is she watching porn. Just be happy that she has come to you with the problem and not her friends.
Every mom can probably think of different beauty trends or grooming trends or body decorating trends they have lived through. What we don’t want is our young girls being alone with a razor or hair remover and not knowing how to use them.
Whether you ultimately decide to help your daughter to hair-free or not will depend on your family’s boundaries and values. It is really a perfect opportunity to get closer to your daughter and open up a whole new level of conversation and guide her to respect her body.
Don’t be opinionless. You can explain to her the broader issues of beauty ideals changing through time and how trends take all these funny twists. The worst thing you can do is to make her feel that she is doing something wrong.
The hope is that your daughter will walk away with the idea that I can always go to Mom and learn something and get her perspective and she doesn’t judge me. She helps me think about things.